Friday, July 12, 2013

Hallucinations and Crazy Thoughts in the ICU

Ok so in 2009 I was in the hospital after having bowel obstruction surgery. I was having trouble breathing so the doctor's first thought was they were over medicating me, which is just silly since I am a recovering addict with super tolerance. Soooo they gave me narcan which sucks all the narcotics out of your system at once. I've been on pain meds for years (at the time I was wearing a fentanyl patch). I had a seizure and the hallucinations began. I thought I went through some kind of horrible portal to a place called Orgrimmar (a place in world of warcraft) where everyone looked like the people from Avatar (waaaay before avatar came out with previews) then they realized I had flash edema, and my lungs were full of fluid. My O2 was at 68. That's when they took me to the ICU and I began a weird journey into crazy town. I decided they were stealing my pain meds and giving them to Michael Jackson who was dead. I thought his kids stole my nephew. There was a troop of tiny circus performers living under my bathroom tiles and I was in Afghanistan at one point talking to my IV pole and heart monitor because they were soldiers guarding me. The fan kept telling me the nurses were tricking me.I kept asking where all the cats came from and then I thought I had to fart....it wasn't a fart. I crapped all over the bed and told the nurse "I think that chili made me sick! " I hadn't eaten in two weeks. I finally came to, tied to the bed with blood on my hands. I asked Barry if I had a psychotic break and he said no you just kept trying to get up to go find your nephew. All the while my lips were cracked and bleeding (hence the blood) and stuck to my teeth my hair standing on end and eyes bugging out. Barry said when I asked how I looked "Horrifying " lol. What's weird is though I know they were hallucinations, they still seem like real memories....

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